I am a boy named Sue. How do you do?

31st January 2013

Post with 41 notes

Will You Still Love Me?

Will you still love me when I get undressed, when I pull down the layers of nylon and spandex and you see what’s underneath.  Will you still love me when there’s nothing there at all. Will you still love me when you find the word “dyke” carved into my thigh, see me wear “fag” like a badge of honor I can’t tell my parents about. Will you still love me, when I can’t meet your parents? When you can’t meet mine?

Will you still love me when scarred arms turn into scarred biceps? When I get cursed at for being in the “wrong” bathroom, when I have bad days? Will you still love me when my voice drops, when you no longer recognize it in public, when I am a stranger in bed? Will you still love me at the dentist when they call the wrong name and I burst out in tears?

Will you still love me when we can’t get married and the only thing normal about our civil union is how uncomfortable the guests are, even when we tell them to wear sweatpants, even when it’s just a piece of paper that I have to sign backwards, will you still love me on the bad days? Will you still love me when you are not pregnant, when you can’t get pregnant, when everyone around you is expecting that you’re expecting, will you still love me when he is born? Will you still love me when he is in kindergarten and some kid explains to him that his dad is not his father, will you still love me on the bad days? Will you still love me when I can’t throw a baseball, when I can’t teach him how to wrestle, or do math? Will you still love me in old Facebook photos, or new ones?

Will you still love me on the bad days? When I can’t get out of bed, when I cringe at your touch, when strangers stutter my pronouns like stubbed toes. Will you still love me when the people behind picket lines hate you because of me?

Will you still love me on the bad days?

Or will you slice me out of your life with a scalpel build yourself a new body that has never touched mine carve out your name, and our son, pack up my pick-up and leave?

I won’t blame you.

Things don’t always work out the way we planned.

Sometimes I want to leave, too.

But I swear to you, I’ll still love you if you leave. And I’ll paint his room pink if he asks and wait to use pronouns until he’s old enough to tell us himself, and I’ll teach him to tie a bowtie or curl his hair or do both at the same time.

And I will teach him that he is loved.

Especially on the bad days.

Tagged: transftmwritingi don't knowlovei guess

  1. dregnaur reblogged this from iwishiwasclay
  2. thegreatunderachiever reblogged this from iwishiwasclay
  3. blintsaroth reblogged this from iwishiwasclay
  4. realmisfitwannabemsft reblogged this from thekitegetsaway
  5. nomadofthenorth reblogged this from iwishiwasclay
  6. alyssanicholeoneal reblogged this from jacobayden
  7. makeadventurehappen reblogged this from jacobayden
  8. crofoot12 reblogged this from thekitegetsaway
  9. jacobayden reblogged this from thekitegetsaway
  10. natethechemist reblogged this from iwishiwasclay
  11. iwishiwasclay reblogged this from thekitegetsaway
  12. the-roaming-elf reblogged this from thekitegetsaway
  13. tranniesaurusrex reblogged this from thekitegetsaway
  14. greynick reblogged this from thekitegetsaway
  15. mormon-face reblogged this from biggerbadderlatterday and added:
    Made me cry.
  16. violentvoices reblogged this from biggerbadderlatterday
  17. sarahoy-quin reblogged this from biggerbadderlatterday
  18. biggerbadderlatterday reblogged this from thekitegetsaway
  19. anastaceymcboston reblogged this from thekitegetsaway and added:
    @lo4cle: I love you. Even on those bad days. I love you. Especially on those bad days. @thekitegetsaway: Beautiful poem....
  20. thekitegetsaway posted this